We’ve prepared a set of frequently asked questions (FAQs) because we understand that the world can be an arcane, confusing place and we’re here to set you straight. (We’d much rather set you free, but our web developer has rigged it so that you’re not allowed to leave our website until you purchase a book. Seriously. If you exit our site without buying at least one measly book, the motherboard of your computer will catch a virus so nasty that it will make the plague look like a common cold.)
Now that we have your attention (and the cyber police are circling our IP address), let’s lose it once again and set the tone for the rest of your online Atticus experience. You’ve already exceeded the median number of seconds that a typical user would linger on a page, so we’ve met our first goal:
1) Respect your time and efficiently waste it without having you resent us for the rest of your natural-born reading days. If it were possible, in fact, we’d refund the time you’ve spent reading this letter, but as a small business with limited customer-centric tools (Google Analytics only delves so Big Brother-deep), our ability to customize your experience—and calculate the value of your time—is rather limited, so alas, you’ll have to go elsewhere if you want to be paid for your time.
Don’t tell anyone we told you this, but Wal-Mart, we think, would be a good target if you’re looking to bilk a company for wasting your time. We, on the other hand, would make for a lousy target. We have no idea how to make money. We only know good literature when we read it and we know how to find authors worth reading. This brings us to our second goal:
2) Build a lifelong relationship with readers who share our passion for fine, contemporary literature. If you’ve made it this far in this meandering trail of coffee-fueled mind crumbs (we haven’t even gotten to the FAQs yet!), then we’ll assume that all of the following characteristics apply:
* You are open-minded enough to read our books.
* You have a desire to serendipitously discover new writers with distinct voices.
* You are driven to crack open a novel that beat the odds and saw the light of day because a couple of crazy (um, thoughtful) editors in Kensington, Maryland, decided it was a manuscript well worth publishing.
Have you noticed from our tone that we’re not much for rules of etiquette? No, our apologies in advance, this is not the first question in our promised list of FAQs, though we could get to those if you’re getting antsy but really they’re not that great anyway. How about we first come up with a third goal and then we’ll get to those all-important FAQs? After all, two goals seem utterly inadequate for a reputable company to list. Does a pair of anything even qualify as a list? A trio barely makes the grade, but at least it shows some spirited effort. So here’s our third goal:
3) Surprise and delight you with each and every interaction you have with us. Life on the outside (you know, offline and away from us) is so predictable. Boring. Repetitious. If you can’t find intellectual stimulation here, then we’re not doing our job. If you can’t find enlightenment, provocation, or pure, unadulterated entertainment, then we’re guaranteed to lose you to TV and we refuse to lose you to prime time idiocy. (Haven’t you heard? A book commits suicide every time you watch “Jersey Shore.”)
We’re not here to numb your senses (we’re realistic: we know we can’t compete with alcohol), nor are we here to offer formulaic drivel. We’re here to challenge your senses and make you care about reading and the world at large. We’re here to lead you on a path of self-discovery without drilling you over the head with psychobabble. We’re here to turn you on to the brilliant, little-known planets that reside in the small press universe.
Poke around. Read our blog. Check out our content. Once you get a flavor of the things we’re doing, you’ll be hooked. We’re like the ice cream that you remember as a kid, only better for you.
All right then, are you ready to have those burning questions answered? Here goes:
Is Atticus Books a traditional book business with a standard mode of operation?
Is Atticus Books a publisher of books (and a weekly online journal, Atticus Review) that does things differently than most presses?
Are Atticus book titles available everywhere that eclectic & electric books are sold?
Yep and you can also buy our books at the Atticus Online Store but know this: we actually want you to read them too.